Over a twelvemonth ago, my hubby and I sat downward in the living area of the home we formerly idea would be our "next 30 years" home. We talked concerning the forthcoming and set a goal: Before our son starts kindergarten, we'll move to the Netherlands.
Everyone told us parenthood would alter our priorities, but living the procedure firsthand was motionless a shock. In delayed 2024, following the birth of our archetypal kid, my hubby and I the two had the creeping emotion that the United States wouldn't be our everlastingly home.
By the period he archetypal vocalized the thought, we had one of those open-mouthed moments. We realized we'd arrived at the identical decision without always discussing it.
It took a bit of period to decide anywhere we wanted to move. We've lived in California for our entire marriage and don't desire to provision up certain luxuries we have here, akin admission to quality healthcare and a varied community.
However, there are certain things we desire from a new home, too, akin stricter gun restrictions and a distinct public-education system.
After much conversation and research, the Netherlands checked all our boxes and afterward some. We visited final twelvemonth and confirmed it: Moving current was our goal.
Up until this point, we'd accepted on everything. Then, we started talking concerning the logistics … specifically, money.
We've continually had distinct attitudes toward money
When it comes to most things, my hubby and I can create decisions, arrive to uncomplicated compromises, and move quickly. However, it took us complete a twelvemonth of marriage — and lots of conversations — to awareness comfortable merging our financial institution accounts.
My hubby is extremely money-literate and a small money-obsessed. Meanwhile, I'll put prosperity into our funds document and promptly ignore concerning it.
He's fascinated by business, has powerful opinions on investing, and consistently reevaluates our larger wealth-building plan. I advantage greatly from his fascination alongside money, since none of this is my powerful suit.
Our goal to move to the Netherlands has plopped us into among the additional complex discussions concerning prosperity that we've had in a decade of marriage. It boils downward to a key disagreement: He wants to build prosperity first, afterward move. I desire to move, afterward resume construction wealth.
He sees the Netherlands as a complete line. I see it as our next starting line.
He wants to 'retire' to the Netherlands, but I desire to commencement fresh
We planned to move to the Netherlands through the Dutch-American Friendship Treaty (DAFT), which allows an entrepreneur to move a small endeavor to the Netherlands and activity toward residency.
However, it seems difficult to acquisition a residence without a full-time job alongside a Dutch employer. The alternative, the rental market, is tough, too. Some leases necessitate expats to pay a complete twelvemonth (or two!) of rent entirely up front.
According to my husband, there's an apparent "best" plan: preserve adequate prosperity current in the US so we can buy a house, alongside cash, in the Netherlands.
Now, we have a young son, and we're expecting alongside baby figure two. A livable flat for a family of four would disbursal anyplace between 450,000 euros and 600,000 euros. In USD, this would average we'd effortlessly be spending complete $500,000 at the low end — apt much more.
We oversee our prosperity well, but we don't have that benevolent of money. And between our current mortgage, the cost of childcare for two kids, and the broad elevated disbursal of living in Northern California, it's difficult to see that changing complete the next two or three years.
My projected solution? We move now and commencement off as renters. A complete twelvemonth of rent for a livable two-bedroom flat in the coveted Ramstand area of the Netherlands would run us concerning 24,000 euros, or concerning $28,000.
This way, we could continue to build our prosperity in the Netherlands. Jump, and fig it out as we go.
That doubt terrifies my husband, who doesn't desire to commencement from scratch. I comprehend his perspective: We're comfortable correct now. He's making a fit income. He's fearful of leaving rearward this existence and ending up worse off.
If we jump and rent, we're landing without jobs. However, I accept we'll fig it out.
We're motionless figuring out our plans — and operating toward our end goal
We've talked until we're the two blue in the face. Our current scheme is two-fold: preserve as much as we can current in the US, and use aggressively for jobs in the Netherlands. The two routes onward aren't in conflict, so we'll activity toward both.
Our thinking is that, alongside time, one of us volition either discover a job that volition authorize us to meet requirements for a Dutch home loan and purchase a home alongside a loan, or we'll accrue adequate prosperity current in the US to buy a Dutch residence outright.
Two routes, two distinct financial strategies, and two possibly extremely distinct timelines for moving. We've got three years to hit our goal of moving before our son starts kindergarten, and we anticipation one of these strategies volition assistance us do it.
Did I citation that I'm expecting and we have a toddler? It's going to be a occupied few years, but we're excited.
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Allison Lau began her occupation tracking monkeys through tropical forests as a PhD behavioral researcher before turning her concentration to individual stories. Today, she serves as a developmental publishing company for memoirs and mission-driven nonfiction that create readers awareness deeply and think differently. With 13 years of investigation cognition studying animal behavior and social dynamics, Allison brings a rare blend of precision, empathy, and narrative intuition to all project. She describes herself as person who turns coffee into words, preferably at a cafe in a abroad country. Follow her latest penning and reflections on storytelling complete at https://substack.com/@allisonrlau.
