I spent years building a 'perfect' life and career in Chicago. Then, I left it all behind to move to Portugal.

Aug 12, 2026 06:51 PM - 1 hour ago 1

Woman smiling successful beforehand of balcony

Within six months of moving to a caller country, I realized I had built precisely what I had been acrophobic of losing. Marissa Liesenfelt

I built the life everyone told maine I should want.

I was the main operating serviceman of a increasing company. I owned a location successful Chicago. I drove a luxury car.

From the outside, everything looked for illustration a success. Yet immoderate chance I got, I would leave.

I'd book a trip. Sometimes pinch friends, sometimes solo. Traveling was the only clip I felt genuinely for illustration myself. When I came home, I'd commencement readying the adjacent flight — sometimes earlier I had moreover unpacked.

I spent years creating a life I perpetually needed breaks from. I dreamed of leaving corporate, starting my ain business, and moving to Europe.

But 3 fears kept maine frozen: losing financial security, disappointing my mom by leaving arsenic her only child, and having to rebuild a societal life from scratch successful a overseas country.

Yet contempt the fears, the propulsion to time off grew stronger pinch each trip. I was conscionable waiting to consciousness genuinely ready.

After immoderate conversations pinch a therapist, I realized I was waiting for a emotion that wasn't coming. I wasn't ever going to consciousness ready. I was going to person to do it frightened and judge that I would disappoint group successful bid to take myself.

So I made a decision.

I put everything I owned into retention and, successful April 2023, near the US pinch 2 suitcases and a one-way summons to Europe to test-drive being an expat.

My first extremity was Lisbon.

It didn't return agelong to recognize I'd made the correct prime — but that didn't make it an easy one

Woman smiling successful apartment

This was the infinitesimal I knew I was home.  Marissa Liesenfelt

Roughly 2 weeks into the trip, I was sitting successful my Airbnb pinch the sun sparkling successful done the unfastened window, the sounds of the lively Lisbon streets outside, and a cup of espresso erstwhile it deed me: This is it. This is home.

The emotion amazed me, but I was arsenic definite arsenic I'd been successful a agelong time.

A period later, connected my birthday, I was successful Bodrum, Turkey, overlooking the oversea erstwhile I watched a video circuit of an flat successful Lisbon. It checked each container connected my wishlist.

I told the supplier yes.

woman successful chapeau smiling by water

I secured my Lisbon flat astatine a Turkish resort.  Marissa Liesenfelt

Then came the portion I dreaded the most: telling group I was fundamentally quitting my existent life.

First, my mom.

I braced myself for the worst. She cried erstwhile I told her I was leaving. But aft immoderate clip to process, and a committedness that I would return location for Christmas, she said much than anything, she wanted maine to beryllium happy, and she would study to header pinch my decision.

Then my boss.

This went amended than expected. She said she knew this was coming eventually. She moreover sent maine disconnected pinch clients to thief maine get started successful my caller business venture.

Then came the visa.

Paperwork, appointments, and a full batch of Google Translate. It wasn't easy, but it besides wasn't the intolerable task I had built it up to be. It was mostly conscionable navigating authorities websites, pursuing steps carefully, reference good print, and a awesome instruction successful patience.

At last, it was clip to look the last fear: building a caller life from scratch.

Within a fewer months, I had created a life filled pinch each of the things I was frightened to suffer

Two female smiling successful beforehand of greenery

The region really deepened my narration pinch my mom.  Marissa Liesenfelt

I joined each expat community I could find. I went to Meetup events. I slid into the DMs of section Instagram influencers. I attended dinners designed for singles to make friends.

I joined WhatsApp groups. I took creation classes. I tried Bumble BFF. I went to parties wherever I knew 1 personification and tried not to cling.

It was awkward astatine times, but if I walked distant pinch 1 caller friend, I would see it a success. Slowly but surely, my relationship circle grew.

By the extremity of that year, arsenic I posed for a photograph astatine a vacation meal pinch friends, I looked astir and realized I had built precisely what I had been acrophobic of losing.

A afloat societal life. A increasing business. A consciousness of stableness I didn't expect to find truthful quickly. I had a busier societal almanac successful Lisbon aft six months than I did aft a life successful Chicago.

My mom and I started taking trips together, thing we ne'er did erstwhile we lived 20 minutes apart. The region made our clip together acold much intentional, which really deepened our relationship.

Looking back, I only wish I'd moved sooner

Woman smiling successful cobblestone road

I'm gladsome I took the leap and moved abroad.  Marissa Liesenfelt

Three years later, I'm starting different caller section successful Amsterdam pinch a level of assurance I ne'er had earlier — thing I ne'er could person imagined erstwhile I boarded that one-way formation to Lisbon.

This time, the excitement acold outweighs the fear. What erstwhile felt for illustration rebuilding a life from scratch now feels for illustration an opportunity to meet absorbing caller group and clasp a caller culture.

The friends I made successful Lisbon are already readying to visit. I'm leaving Portugal pinch acold much than I came with.

My only regret successful this travel is spending excessively galore years waiting to beryllium "ready." All I ever really needed was a large dose of courageousness and guardant momentum.

I won't opportunity it was easy. But it was acold much manageable than I had imagined. The fearfulness of taking the leap was overmuch harder than the leap itself.

Read next

Marissa is an American expat and 8-fig Operator turned Business Mentor to female founders. She helps women go unstoppable leaders who declare their unsocial brilliant and build wealthiness connected their terms.

Business Insider

Follow Following

Every clip publishes a story, you’ll get an alert consecutive to your inbox!

Look retired for an alert successful your inbox the adjacent clip publishes a story!

Every clip a caller communicative is published, you’ll get an alert consecutive to your inbox!

Look retired for an alert successful your inbox the adjacent clip a caller communicative is published!

By clicking “Sign up”, you work together to person emails from Business Insider. In addition, you judge Insider’s Terms of Service and Privacy Policy.

More stories by More stories from

More